Weeping all around, how can I live here?
The world is so so bad, how can I pass a day,
I don’t want to read the evening news papers
I don’t want to hear the frightful breaking news.

Crying all around, reasons are so much…
The men are so so bad, how can I live with them.
How can I wish good luck, I know that won’t work
How can I have a wish, I lost all my hopes.

Battles all around, for winning big zeros
The rulers are so bad; they may kill us too,
How can I vote for them, nothing good to choose?
How can I trust on them, once they broke all trusts?

Cheatings all around, for earning bad zeros,
The sellers are not good, they sold all their goodness.
Byers also cheat; they want to buy all sins.
How can I be honest, in this world of frauds?

How they win the world by killing all of us?
How they enjoy wealth by cheating all of us?
How they smell fragrance by spraying all our blood?
What a world is this? Can I have an answer?

I can see mothers, wandering all around,
Expelled from their homes, reasons are many.
How their sons can sleep, with their sons in calm
Later their sons too, will do the same to them?

Crying children around, in all the nightmares
Some of them have been, raped so cruelly,
Some of them may be the victims of all wars.
How can I stop seeing that? Can I have an answer?

How can I pass a day, without knowing all these?
How can I escape from all these haunting thoughts?
I can be in my closed room, but can it stop all these?
Truth stares me, that I can’t change anything.

Each moment I enjoy, somebody is in sorrow.
Happiness I can have, but somebody is in pain.
Can I have a feast, when others are in starving?
How can I pass a day, Can I have an answer?

I don’t want to be a priest, to live near to god,
I don’t want to be a prophet, to purify the sins,
I want to be a man among all other humans,
At least one day here, in my dream ideal world.

I don’t want to write a long article about the ‘freedom of women in society’ or ‘equality of women and men’. I never impressed in any of those subjects and, in fact I hate all those scraps. But please don’t misunderstand me, it is not because of I am against women’s freedom or equality, but in reality I never thought about women, our counterparts, in anyway inferior than us men. But unnecessary pleading of equality can create an illusion of inferior feeling among women, which is unfair and thus should be avoided with a strong belief of knowing and building self power and confidence of their own.

A real fact hurts me more intensely than the above mentioned subject is something else, but that may not create an impact on you and may not digest you after the initial read. But still I want to write about that again where ever I am getting an opportunity to present it in front of a vast community. That is about thousands of girls and women out there in our streets, wandering all around for a piece of bread to find a solution for a times empty stomach, searching even in the waste bins to feed their babies, receiving up to thirty customers a day at the age of thirteen in prostitution dens. Poverty and poor situations lead them to reach those pathetic states, but we, the civilized people nicely close our eyes, turn around and think about only our life which is still going on. You people may not realize the facts by sitting and reading this in posh and polished rooms, but as a person gone through the middle of extreme realities and visualized the unbelievable facts those are hard to accept, I am able to write this at least.

I thought about writing a story to convince a few out there, but later dropped that idea. Writing a tragic story of an abandoned stray girl or a girl thrown in to brothel home can jerk a few drops of tears from your eyes. But that doesn’t give any benefit to those girls who are really living a life of those characters. So what is the use?

In reality they are not even counted as humans; they are unlisted in any government listings. They have not been counted as Indians, not as Hindus, not as Muslims, nothing… even not considered as humans too. I have seen many strikes and agitations for availing more benefits to particular communities, particular areas, and various issues affecting we civilized people. But who is there to raise voice for them and who are there to strike for them. A few charity organizations and orphanages are there but comparing to the actual volume of them, those are not enough even for one percentage. So where is a solution? I have never seen any public or political movement pleading government to take care about those unwanted humans. Government is pouring billions of money in various projects to develop our country, but if they allot the equal money of a single project for rehabilitating those people, I think that will be enough to wipe out the entire stray girls at least in our metros. That was my imagination only and nothing is going to work out, I know that too. So I am introducing a new plan and trying to convey this message to as many as I can, through what ever Medias I can avail.

So sad, we can’t change the entire world, don’t even think about that, because it is like an ant trying to take a hill, leave that, but an ant can take a piece of sand from the hill. Then I decided to do what I can? That only is my aim to do. Do only what I can….and the result of that idea is ….

“Take a girl and make a woman”

I want to emphasis this to all my readers too, just to introduce my vision to an enlarged frame. From the childhood I had a vision and later developed and finally reached into a shape and become the answer of how can I change a life and how can I make a woman. Yes I can make a woman. Let us see how it is?

Think about the present life of such a girl who comes in front of you or god shows in front of you, and then think about her future after a few years when she becomes a woman. Who will be she? She will be a beggar, a prostitute or a wandering girl or whatever may be in pathetic situations. Then think about what you can change on her. If you can make a change on her life, you will be doing an act which is not less than making the life of a woman.

There you can create a woman, proud living woman, than a stray girl doesn’t be counted by anybody. Once in a time, after a few years, when you see her going to school in nice uniforms, you can imagine about where she would have been if you were not there. Once in a time, when she starts going for a new job as a proud woman, you can imagine about she is sitting in a brothel home if you were not there.
And you can feel that you are the one made that woman; you are the only one made the life of a proud and independent woman. If you were not there, there would have been a stray girl lived and died through out sufferings. What a waste of life?

And that is something which is unachievable by any human being around you. It will be the greatest achievement in your life. And I insist only one, not many, only one. If you can take a single girl representing the entire poverty and sufferings around you, and make her a woman, that is enough for your life time. Can you do that?

Of course you are doing everything to your family and giving everything to your daughters. But you are not creating or changing the life of anybody. Your kids are supposed to reach where you want them to reach. But a poor girl, who is not supposed to reach in any of those positions in the new life which you are building for her, which is not supposed to be achievable even in her wild dreams. And later whatever you do for her will be a transformation of her future and history. There you, a single human being, can pay the benefits to entire humanity to survive with goodness.

You will not have any regrets about the poverty and sufferings around you. No stray girls on street can disturb your dreams. And you are changing the history of a proud woman, and thus you are making a woman.

Can anybody do that? Can anybody have the heart to do that? Can anybody have the fortitude to do that?

Can the authorities look in this to promote the idea?

It is not about a childless couple adopt a girl from an orphanage, but adopting a street girl to a loving family, childless or with their kids, doesn’t matter.

I know there are legal issues in the present system, but authorities should take necessary steps to start a movement. We need to change the system to accommodate all the human beings; the world is not only for us.

We all can’t start an orphanage or girls home, but we all can accommodate one in our home, as our daughter, is it possible?

If a quarter of us do this in the future, how many lives can we change?

Can we do that?

If my article can become a sparking reason for getting a life to a single such girl, now wandering somewhere in any of our streets, and if she can become a proud woman like all of you, that will be the most satisfactory feeling which I would consider than my entire achievements in my life as a writer and as a human being. One more thing before a stop, I was always ready for starting this movement but failed a few times due to unfortunate reasons, still waiting for an opportunity and legal help from authorities.

I want to tag the following bloggers and I will inform them about the contest.
Anju
Smitha
Deeps

I have faced this question many times in my life. Most of the times that question raised by a confused person who believes himself as a believer of god, most probably he must be a polytheist. And my truthful answer is always I am a believer of god and I can not be an atheist and I can’t stay a micro inch away from that unknown power.

But many of you believe that you are true believers and worshipping your god always, but still you may be a real atheist.

How can a person be an atheist without even knowing the truth that he is an atheist?

Simple answer, “if you do not believe in god, you must be an atheist”.

You may be a polytheist, but still that can be a reason for you to be an atheist.

It is just like mistakenly interchanged babies in the delivery room and whole life they love somebody else as their father. His love is truthful, but I feel pity for that son, same way I feel pity for all god’s sons and daughters in the similar situations.

A vast subject very briefly says…

Human life evolved through various cultures, and various communities started praying various myths and started calling all those are gods and believed that all those have powers to be a god and they started worshipping. There would have been many reasons for them to do that. The followers of those groups and their generations also did the same and still their present generation follows that, and believe what they believe is the real god. They must have got some historical stories to prove their beliefs.

If I am able to be a spectator watching all these incidents from outside throughout the generations, what would be my reactions to their beliefs?

If I am totally aware about the evolution of incidents and all the stories and myths created by men, what will be my reaction to those gods?

All those men and their generations and the whole world had been created by some unknown power and our awareness about that power is a big zero.

Do they believe in god?

No they do not at all believe in god, but believing in some beliefs handed over by somebody. So how can we call them as believers of god? No doubt they are atheists.

The same way vast majority of human beings are still atheists. They never have thought about god a single second in their life. All their life is being wasted by running behind the man made lords. They are devotees of babas, swamis, bhagavans, epic Heros etc.
But nobody is a devotee of god.

So don’t think that you are a believer, think about your beliefs. What do you believe?
What are you worshipping? The one I worship is a man made one or god’s own one?

How men can make gods, if so, why should I pray those gods?

Who told me first to worship that god? How he came to know that is the real god to be worshipped? What was his authority to tell me to worship that?

Who told you that you are in this religion? There was any marks on your body by birth proving that you should be in any particular religion and worship only the selected gods in that religion?

If a sensible person sits and thinks about these questions can easily find that all what we do are the results of big foolishnesses.

So you are a devotee of god… or what?

You may be a person regularly visiting temples, churches, ashrams or any man made institutions related to god, but still you can be an atheist.

Do you want to live as an atheist?

It is your decision.

Once I went to Madras (Now it is Chennai) for an interview. I caught an auto from Madras central to the hotel where the interview takes place. I was very tired after a long train journey. So before getting in to the auto, I took some soft drinks from one busy shop near railway station. But after drinking I forgot to take my suitcase with all my money and all my original certificates inside. I kept it just in front of the shop and quickly entered in auto and went to the hotel where the interview was going on with my handbag only in hand.
There was a lot of tension in my head and I was in hurry also, so I could not immediately notice about the missing suitcase and I waited in the reception for more than three hours. I remembered that only when they announced my name as the next candidate. I was looking for the certificates and shocked by seeing no suitcase and certificates besides me.
Immediately I ran out but couldn’t remember where I missed it.
I just walked all the way behind with out any aim.
I searched all the reception and in front of the hotel, I couldn’t find it.
Then I got a doubt that it may be there in the railway station or may be in that shop where I had the drinks.
But now almost four hours passed, how it will be there now in this big city?
Impossible!!!
And no money to catch an auto again, for safety I kept my purse also inside the suitcase and kept a hundred rupee note only in my pocket, damn it !! that I gave to that auto driver also.
I sat down beside the road on a cement wall with all my energy lost.
I felt like all my life is gone, what I can do with out my all certificates ?, how can I go back? Who is there to help me in this big city?
May be I have to beg somebody even for going back.

I was totally upset and sat there for a few minutes without any hope and looking on ground.

I looked in front by hearing a call. That was a beggar boy around the age of twelve or thirteen. He was standing in front of me and asking me money showing his hand.
I looked to his hand, there was a one rupee coin.
I checked in my pocket, and found only a one rupee coin.
That was the only one left in my pocket.
What is the use of keeping it there, let it also go…
I thought like that in desperation.
I put it on his hand and said, “Now you are more richer than me, I become poor , I have nothing in my hands”
He looked on my face with unbelief, and then asked in Tamil.
“You look like a rich man, then where all your money gone?”
“Yes boy, I was rich, but I lost my suitcase somewhere near railway station”

He didn’t say anything for a moment and started walking, but suddently turn around and told me something unexpected from him.
“Sir, don’t worry sir, your bag must be still there only where u kept it, go fast and take it”
That time one bus came and stopped near us.
He put that one rupee coin back to my hand and again put one more coin, that was his earning and said.
“Sir, get in this bus, you can reach railway station with this two rupees, go fast”
I was not in a state to give any reply, but I got some energy from his words and ran to the bus and got in.
I reached railway station in half an hour.

How luckily I found my suitcase was still there in the same place where I kept.
No body even touched it.
So many people were rushing all the way around, but nobody noticed that suitcase luckily, or I think it was still under the custody of god.
I returned back in an auto again. Before reaching the hotel I searched for that boy everywhere near the bridge to give him some money for my pleasure.
But I couldn’t find him.
That was an amazing experience.
…………………

Once again I missed some valuable items.
That was a very expensive camera and the set of printout photos taken by that camera.
I received all the printouts from a studio and unfortunately put camera also inside that cover, then we went for a long shopping all over Kuwait city and Malia city.
After a long shopping in many shops we returned home and checked all bags and found camera and photos were missing.
I couldn’t remember where I kept it and it is very difficult to go and check in many shops. But I joked to Renu keeping in mind my previous experience that not to worry; I will get it back definitely.
But I didn’t have any hope.
But that also happened amazingly!!

After around three months, we were doing again another shopping in Kuwait city and went to one sari shop. Renu started selecting saris, after some time that shop owner called me and I went near to him. Then he took a photo and looked on my face and confirmed something.
Then gave me our old cover with camera and all photos are safe in that and said that he got that cover on that day inside the shop.
But he was a good man and didn’t take it to home. Instead he kept it there only and observing everybody coming to the shop and expected to return once when the real owner arrives.
We told many thanks to that honest shop owner.
That was a happy moment to see some good people are still in our world.

These incidents taught me one thing. Don’t fear about any losses when it happens.
Any thing you earned THROUGH GOOD AND TRUE WAY WITHOUT CHEATING OR HURTING ANYBODY will never lose from you. If you lost also, it will come back to you, or god will bring it back to your hands.

“Hay Priya, could you please explain me something”?

What Sir?
………..

“Tell me what the ways that AIDS can be transmitted are?”

Whaaaaaaaaaaaat?

Silence…..

All the people around stunned by hearing my question.

Renu stopped drinking and staring to my face with unbelief.

She asked with chocking words, what Ayyan, what happened you? What did you ask to her just now?

Yes that’s what I asked, Priya give me the answer?

“I asked again”

Priya was still in the shock that what she heard from her husband’s boss and in a dilemma what to say or not to say and she was looking to Mohan’s face like crying.

I didn’t want to trouble everybody for long time, so I laughed and broke the silence.

“Hay Dear Priya you have studied in Baselius college right?”

“Yes Sir, how do you know that?’

“Can you remember your classes in Kings English institute and look on my face again?”

Again silence for a few moments….

Suddenly the expressions changed on her face and asked me loudly…

“Yes Sir I can remember you sir, oh was that you sir our grammar teacher?”

“Yes, exactly..” I said.

“Oh my god!! I can remember, and very very sorry about that sir, but I am so happy to know that you still remember me.”
Everybody sighed with relief including Renu but was in enthusiastic to know what the story is behind.

Then party hall become a class room and I become a story telling teacher.
……………………

After the completion of my studies, I was desperately looking for a job.
I was a topper in the college and that made my life troublesome.
Because of all my relatives and neighbors were thinking that I am a top ranker and companies are going to come to my home immediately after the course and they are going to pick me up and put in the manager’s seat.

But that was not the real fact.

Nothing happened after many months also.
The procedure of sending applications and attending interviews continued endless and I become despaired and not in a situation to look on others faces.
And who ever I meet on road was asking about my job and that question was irritating me like anything.
I didn’t want to sit in home with out doing any job and that was killing boring.
I changed my daily routine.
Every day I waited up to nine o’clock to watch the arrival of postman with any white cover in hand. I was always expecting some interview or appointment letters.
Those days internet and email were not even in my dreams also.
So my time pass was only one thing.
Immediately after postman’s arrival, I used to take a file in hand and going out without looking both sides in full sleeve shirt in executive style.
I did that to make others think that I am going for job or some higher studies.

But my routine was strange, morning to noon I was in a public library and when that closes at noon I was shifted to bishop’s library and again evening to public library.
That was the routine.
Then one day I met my friend in library and I told him my all problems. After hearing all, he proposed to me a solution.

“Can u take grammar classes for pre degree girls?”

“What are you asking? Grammar class, may be I have to refer all the English books from school classes again, okay that can be managed some how, but again how to manage the pre degree girls?”

I got a shivering in my legs, how that will work out for a nervous person like me?
But he encouraged me,” nothing will happen, you can do that?”
I had no other choices in front of me, so I accepted that offer and that was a small holding place for a person who was already drowning.
I started my classes with confidence.
The first few days were fine, but I was in front of the girls always with a heavily beating heart and some how completed the lessons and worrying everyday about the next day.
And one day that happened and that made me to make an end of my teaching career.

And she was the reason…Priya..
I noticed that girl on my first day itself and tried to avoid even an eye contact with her.
She was the smartest girl in the class and always surrounded with a group of her friends.
She was a cheerleader or a gangster of them.
I actually feared that group of butterflies.
And there was a very bad system there and that was troubling me always.
Every Friday was a day for interaction in English. In that class all the students can ask any questions in English and I should give answers in English to make the language fluent for them.
The first few questions were easy and I managed all.
Then there was a loud voice from the gang.
Priya called me and asked me very politely..

“Sir shall I ask a question please?”

Trying to hide my worries on face and I told her to ask.
She asked politely.

“Sir what are the ways that AIDS can be transmitted?”

All the girls started laughing by hearing that and started making many comments.

It was a simple question at any other instance and I knew the answer too.
But still I become nervous and my mouth become dry.

Some how I managed to tell that “AIDS is a serious decease and…….. it is spreading because of …unsafe ….

“Unsafe what sir?”

“ unsafe……….blood transaction”

Priya’s gang was laughing and she asked again, “that we know sir, but one more?

My hands and legs started shivering, some how again I said” because of…… using same needle……. to infected people…….. and…… others ……can be a cause …..no?…”

They laughed again and didn’t want to leave me…”sir we know that but one more, some thing like precaution while doing something? Didn’t you know that?”

….I said…”may be… may be …by…….. kissing each…. other can…also…… transmit no?….’

“No sir no…you don’t know? One more…main cause?”

I am totally lost and some how managed to tell that I will go to office and come back.

I quickly jumped out even with out taking my books and pen and that was my way out to my teaching profession also….
………..
…………

When I stopped my story, Priya came to me and said,,

“Yes all you said is true and please forgive me sir, that was just for a teenage fun and I am very happy to see you again here. And once you left the college we all felt very bad and wanted to meet you again for asking sorry, but we could never meet you and it happened now only, so now I am asking that sorry again sir”

I said, its all okay Priya, now I can understand that was a funny incident and I am also very happy to see you again here, and you will be one of our best family friends from today.

Mohan came and hold my hands while everybody was laughing.

I could not do anything on fear… my hands and lugs are become stuck like a statue.
Hay what is happening… her lips touched my face….
Was that a kiss???
A breeze with a bunch of roses fell on me…I had become weightless like a feather and slowly lifted up with the wind…I fell asleep.
I don’t want to open the glasses of my car, because I love the cooling inside. I don’t want a crazy hand to come inside and catch my hair… I can go inside a crowd and I can enjoy her half naked dance with a smile on face and a rap music on my HiFi Stereo system, because my glasses are up…I am covered and well protected…I think, Am I cruel too? How much money is enough to satisfy till the maximum possible days allowed, anybody calculated?
Ohhhhh god what a horn…disturbed my thoughts…humming a bee on head…lucky enough up to an inch gap to that truck…life is sometimes near to an inch gap no?
Who cares about that?
I had a little kindness in heart to get a punctured skirt and shirt to her.
But now where I missed it, I can’t remember…now I look other side to escape from the guilty feeling before it starts catching me, because I am inside a bubble created my own.
I fell down from my bicycle… every body started laughing, laughing, laughing only.
She gave a hand to me…. I looked her up side down… a rainbow was glowing behind her head…colorful…cute…I heard light thunders or tremors…..rain is going to come….a few drops hit on my eyes and flowed out…I wasn’t crying…but tears came out… I fell asleep.
Whaaaat a craaaashing sound…what happened behind…I stopped my car, came out and looked back….no … nothing there….empty road and that truck is rushing alone towards the other end of road…an eagle flying parallel to that also alone… both faded away till the limit of my eyes…now only the empty road…I slowly walked on the hard road…hot sun is straight on top and my brain is getting hot…I thought about that rainbow, am I not lucky enough to see a rainbow nowadays. I lost the eyes to see that and lost the heart to enjoy that beauty…but where? turned up my face…only hot sun is there, straight on top, nothing else…empty sky!!!
Where am I sleeping…and my bicycle is on the other side of road…and heard the crashing sound of truck…yes behind…I saw that punctured skirt and shirt….so who pushed me…my god…why did she do that? Mad girl…a mad girl did a mad act and she escaped…me too.
I saw that colorful rainbow behind her hanging hair…upside down again…the rain was stopped …tremors were stopped… was I crying… tears were coming out …there was red horizon behind her… red sun was slowly falling to darkness…

But unexpectedly my attention turned to them may be because of their beauty.
They had small golden wings and yellow dots on it and size was as smaller as a matchstick tip. There acts amused me, I could see they were dancing together, singing together and enjoying there life with out any tension about future. They just reminded me my own honeymoon days and also led me to many thoughts. How god created these small beings and why he has given this shape and beauty to them, they must have a heart and brain?

Hay Ayyan, have you reached already? His loud voice waked me up from thoughts.
He came and sat near to me and lightened a cigarette, before started talking he just looked on ground and saw one of the insect running by hearing the sound of his boots I think. He just crushed it with his heavy boots while talking and laughing with me.
But he didn’t see the other one was running.
I don’t know why he did that and what satisfaction he got by doing that.
That place was not his not mine too. He hasn’t created them and they haven’t done anything against him. What to do? Some people are like this, they don’t even think what they are doing. It is over.

Our talk was also over. He left the place with a big goodbye.
I just looked down again. I could see a few pieces of golden wings and the other one walks and runs around that. I couldn’t understand its language but I knew that, it wasn’t dancing and it wasn’t singing. I was able to hear her (or his I don’t know) loud cry.

She wanted to join with our night trips, but worried about her warden.
She wanted to jump into trekking, but needed a permission granted.
She wanted to drive on a pulsar, but all of us laughed just by hearing.
Thus she wanted to become a boy, and wanted to have our freedom…
How damn world is this, is this world only for men?

She wanted to have a liberty, from all the hazards of a lady.
She wanted to be like her boy friends, thought even a doctor can make her.
How dreary the life as a girl, She wanted to enjoy life like us.
Thus she wanted to become a boy, but she couldn’t fulfill her dreams…
How damn world is this, is this world only for men?

She wanted a lone trip to Mumbai, to attend her test and to come back.
But her mom heard a lot of stories…about city rape victim girls.
So she forced to plead to her sibling, who was nothing more… but a boy,
Thus she wanted to become a boy, but she is still been a girl…
How damn world is this, is this world only for men?

She wanted to go to the crowd and come back without any harm.
She doesn’t want to complain about any boys around….why?
She doesn’t want any equality… because she never been a feminist.
Thus she wanted to become a boy, but she couldn’t become it so far…
How damn world is this, is this world only for men?

She doesn’t want to complain about any dirty staring of men,
Because she knows no boys complain about any dirty staring of girls.
She doesn’t want to complain about any nasty comments of men,
Because she knew no boys complain about any nasty comments of girls
Thus she wanted to become a boy, but she couldn’t become it so far…
How damn world is this, is this world only for men?

Why should I come back before ten, that restriction not to my father?
Why should I call my mom always, that instruction not to my brother…?
I can not bear all these warnings, thus I want to become a boy.
Yes…thus she wanted to become a boy, but she couldn’t fulfill her dreams…
How damn world is this, is this world only for men?

“But, I didn’t have an answer”

(She was a nice friend of us, but with unfulfilled dreams she became a wife of somebody else, hope now the world is yours too…or making a world only of yours.)

Before telling the story, I want to welcome everybody to my office.
The first thing I have is a nice secretary, she is Ani.
She is the heartbeat of our office, being as a secretary she take care of the whole office and all the people in the office. That is her ability, I admit it, and if she is absent the whole office is sleeping.
Then I want to tell you about one handsome and smart guy in our office, he is Rakesh.
He is a friend of everybody and always in happy mood and smart. It is really interesting and time passing to talk with him.
But his wife is direct opposite, she is Supriya, she is also working in this office as a computer operator.
She is a very cute looking innocent girl but not expressive to everybody, always sitting in her place only and very rarely coming out of her place only to take lunch I think.
She doesn’t even talk to her husband also at the office hours, so nice personality.
Our Ani’s husband is a purchase manager in another well known company here in Kuwait.
That is the story he told everybody, but recently Rakesh made some investigation in that matter and he informed me the result of his secret mission.
He found that the story of purchase manager is fake and her husband is actually only a driver in that company. But when ever he comes in our place he is always in a manager’s get up only. What ever it may be, I don’t want to listen all this scraps!!!!

But I know one thing about Supriya, even if she is not talking to many people, but still she is a close friend of Ani. Always coming for lunch together and I found them sitting and talking for a long time.
If I write like this, I have to write about many interesting personalities in our office. But I will write next time about them, because only these characters are appearing in this episode of my office story.

That day was a very busy day and there were so much of tensions from the morning.
I was able to manage all those, but I became tired due to the high fever started hitting me.
I wanted to go back to home and take rest, but was not in a situation to do, because of an important meeting with important clients scheduled after noon.
One of my colleagues noticed my tiredness and advised me to go and take rest in his room at least one or two hours and he said he will inform me before the client’s arrival.
I agreed that because he was staying in a bachelor’s villa very near to our company where as my flat was very far from company.
I went to his villa and opened his room, it was a nice big room and three more rooms on the same floor inside a single floor and the hall was common for all.
I found all other rooms were locked and nobody was there. There also our employees are living but all of them are in office now.
So it is peaceful to sleep for one hour, I thought.
Immediately I went to bed and fell asleep.

After half an hour I heard a female voice and got up from sleep.
It was coming from the hall just outside my room. I tried to listen carefully, it was a known voice but I was not able to hear anything clearly.
Still I wondered who may be there in this bachelor’s building.
What business is going on?
Then I thought it is none of my business. What ever it may be, I didn’t want to open the door and check it.
After a few minutes the sounds disappeared. Then I fell asleep again.
I woke up again after one hour and felt all silent again.
I went to the hall and sat there for five minutes.

Then very unexpectedly that happened.
The door just in front of my room was opened and two people came out.
With out thinking that a person sitting in the hall, they came out and trapped in front of me.
I couldn’t have imagined about them, if I heard this story from somebody else. But I had to believe that, because it happened straight in front of my eyes. They were Ani and Rakesh.
It was a normal practice for them.
I thought that was the reason that many days she used to ask permission for going out one hour and she was telling the reasons that some functions in her kids school or something related to her kids.
Now they have been caught red handed!!!
But I become shocked by seeing both of them.
Nobody talked anything for a few minutes.
Suddenly she ran out without telling anything.
But Rakesh stood their only.
I asked him “Rakesh, what’s happening here? How can I believe this?”
I don’t have to write about his situation at that time, everybody can imagine that.
He didn’t reply anything.
I told him to go out and closed the door.
Many thoughts came in to my mind. How he managed to get the key of this room? Who’s room is that? May be that decent fellow also a part of this.

I went back to office with a disturbed mind about thinking of their families.
How this is going to end up in their family life. I don’t have any idea.
My wife is a close friend of Ani and Supriya. How she will react if I tell this to her.
Anyway I decided to call them and talk individually about this.

First I called Ani.
She came to my cabin with out a pleasant mood.
I asked her” I know it is your personal matter, I don’t want to disturb you, but still I need an answer? How can you cheat your husband and your dearest friend?
She told immediately “ I am not cheating anybody, I know very well about my husbands character and many stories about his relations with many girls, so I am not feeling any guilty in this, and Supriyas case, He only approached me, I couldn’t resist myself, may be my fault, but personal weakness, once it happened and I couldn’t resist.” I will stop doing if you say”

I said” no it is your life and your decision, but what about your kids and family life?

“No problems so far, we live as a happy family still”

“Okay, I am nobody to say anything in this regard; you have the right to decide”

Then I called Rakesh and asked him.

‘Rakesh, did you think about your loving wife?”
He said” I did many times, but I couldn’t control myself…I was like this only from the college days.’

“Oh it is so nice, but do you like to see your wife going with somebody like this?”

“No sir, never, no husbands will never like to see that”

“Rakesh, that is a big joke from you, so man can do anything not woman, that’s what you are thinking?

There was no answer for my question and he also left the room.

That made me to think a lot about family and relations.
How close friends Supriya and Ani are, then what is the meaning of friendship and cheating?
Made for each other couples are Rakesh and Supriya, then what is the meaning of trust and love?
I never wanted to reveal any truths to anybody.

“Better not to tell unhappy truths”

Their life goes on still… happy married lives.
But now whenever I see Supriya with Rakesh, I feel pity about her.

What will happen if god will replay there life episode in front of their partners?

Its fun thinking, but definitely not fun for them.

Story of a pretty innocent teenage girl.

How can I forget her?
She was in my life for hardly one or two hours, but still I regret that I could have given her a life.
…………………………………

Once we were on vacation in Kerala and always my most interesting hobby is driving through the unknown roads by seeing all the greenery around. And that day Renu also joined with me.
When we passed a small city, Renu remembered something and told me to stop the vehicle. She told me that there is somewhere her old teacher lives and she want to meet her after a long time and to give her a surprise visit.
I said okay and easily she spotted a small yellow painted old house before the next turning.
We stopped the vehicle just in front of the gate and went inside. Renu knocked the door while I was searching for the door bell that I couldn’t find.
After a minute a young pretty looking girl opened the door.
Renu told me, that must be Chinnu, teachers only daughter.
She asked her, “hay chinnu, did you remember me?”
Chinnu didn’t like that addressing and replied, “I am not chinnu I am Aparna?” Who are you?
Oh sorry for that Aparna, I am your mothers old student, could you please call her?
She looked both of us and went inside with out giving a smile also.
Renu told me, I am sure that is chinnu only; she was only four years old when Renu saw her last time and she has grown up after around thirteen years. Now she couldn’t recognize Renu.
I thought it is correct, time has changed Renu also a lot, now she is not looking like the naughty girl that I met first time in college and I was in doubt that teacher can recognize her or not.
But teacher came out and proved that my doubts are in wrong place, she immediately recognized her and hugged her with surprise. Then Renu introduced me also to her. Teacher was very happy that we visited her after a long time.
I was planned to spend there only a fifteen minutes, but we couldn’t deny teachers invitation to stay for some time and have a lunch with them. We spent some happy hours with them by remembering the memories of school days and sharing new stories.
Teacher’s life has been miserable after her husband’s death and now she is retired also.
Now her only aim is to give a good education to her only daughter Aparna (she is the same girl, chinnu was the pet name in childhood) and to give her hands to some good boy.
That is the only dream she has now and she is financially troubling a lot after her retire and trying to manage Aparna’s education expenses with the pension amount and a small amount she is earning by taking tuition of some high school students. I saw tears in her eyes when she tells that. My mind gets disturbed terribly when I see that in anybody’s eyes.

But I was wondering about the behavior of Aparna. They said she is a plus two student, and she looks like a smart and beautiful girl with very innocent looking face. But unlike that some thing missing in her character and she didn’t talk to us anything and looked always like depressed.
I asked about her studies just for the sake of breaking silence, but she didn’t entertain that and limited her answer in two words and she was only sitting and watching both of us.
Renu didn’t notice anything while busy talking to her old teacher.
What ever it may be, let it be their own business. I just skipped out and lighted up a cigarette.
After a tasty lunch we told them good bye and moved my car and saw them going behind……..
from my mind also… I am not going to see them again any more.
……………….
……………….
……………….

But faith was different……. I saw her again,

The same day evening I was busy replying some business mails, heard the phone ringing. I looked around for Renu, and couldn’t find her.
So I went and took the phone, that was a female voice that I couldn’t recognize.
I asked again, Hello, may I know who is this?
There was a very soft voice, “I am Aparna, didn’t you remember?”
“No, which Aparna?”
“The same Chinnu, today you came to our house?”
“Hay Aparna, what a surprise, is this you, okay, hold on I will call Renu now.”
“No, please don’t call her?”
‘Then, what?”
“I want to talk to you only.”
“What are you telling, you want to talk to me? “
“Yes, it is something very important and please don’t tell Renu about this.”
I wondered what she has to tell me, I met her today only and I have no other relations with her. But I felt a severe tension in her soft and nervous voice
I asked her calmly,
“What happened Aparna, tell me?”
“Could you please come in front of GCDA complex tomorrow morning at 10 o’ clock, I have an urgent matter to tell you.”
What is this, it seems pretty madness, what to tell her?
She asked again, ‘could you please come?’
“Okay I will come. “
I don’t know why did I say that at that moment.
“Thank you, I will be waiting there, but please don’t tell anybody.”
She cut the phone.
…………………………..
…………………………..

I shut down my computer and sat down in such a dilemma, what to do or not to do?
What may be the reason she is calling me?
May be she is having any love at first sight to me, we don’t know young girls, what they are thinking.
Che che what I am thinking, I am a married man , quiet impossible, she know that also.
Then what?
She must be in some kind of trouble and need my help or may be need some money.
That must be the reason, I assumed. But why me?
After half an hour thinking, I decided not to tell Renu about this. Why to give her a head ache, if I can solve this myself.
……………………..
……………………..

I reached in front of the complex almost the same time what she said.
I saw her waiting in the parking before I reach there. I parked my car and walked to her.

“Hay Aparna nice to meet you again, tell me what is the problem you have?”

Instead of giving answer she invited me to the back side of the complex to sit and talk where empty benches are available in the marine drive.
We sat on an empty bench and I was looking to her face with enthusiasm.
A few moments of silence and I felt a starting trouble for her.
I tried to comfort her and asked her to speak friendly and consider me like a friend or elder brother and tell me whatever she wants to tell.
She broke the silence and started talking.
But the story was a shocking one for me.
She had an affair with a boy who was working in a ladies fancy shop near to her school for more than a year and she believed it was a real love and she dreamed that they will be living together at a time everybody agree them to do that.
She dreamed that all in her immature mind and was trapped in the words and fascination of him.
Once in some moment where she couldn’t resist him and she had all the kinds of physical relations also with him.
But the boy was not a kind of person what she was thinking.
He took many naked photos of her and kept in his custody.
She become shocked by seeing his friends with him when she went to there secret place next time, and he asked her to share fun with them also.
It was insufferable for a girl like her, and she tried to escape from them.
But she was already in side there tight nets.
That incident broke her heart and pushed her in to mere depression.
Recently he started blackmailing her by showing her naked photos and sending photos to her email and asking her to co-operate with them, otherwise they threaten her that they will expose all her photos in internet or distribute in college.
And that was her dilemma that she was not able to tell anybody this matter and nobody was there to help her.
Now she found a last hope after seeing me, and she thought I am a strange person to the village and looks like a decent man and may be I am going to help her.
She explained me a new way to help her.
Just go with her to his place and she will tell him that I am her fiancé and our marriage is been fixed.
And I have to tell him that I knew everything and I accepted all her faults and agreed to marry her. And ask him not to make any trouble and give the photos back and don’t come again in our ways.
I also thought it is a good idea, may be he will not make any trouble if he knows that people are there with her.
But how can I go with her for this purpose.
I will be in trouble and day by day similar cases are there in news papers and I didn’t want my name will get spoiled if something goes wrong.
So I didn’t want to agree her suggestion, instead consoled her and advised her not to worry, this is happening for many girls now a days. And what he can do? Now days so many morphing techniques are there, anybody can create the naked photos of anybody. So don’t worry about that and forget that chapter.
“Don’t go and meet him.”
She found very depressed again by hearing my negative replies.
But what to do, I had no other choices to take.
Going to police or any other officials will cause her name to come out with big publicity and that will spoil her life and the respect of her mother.
We took a juice together and I dropped her to bus stand.
I went back to home with a disturbed mind, again some worries about her.
Should I have to tell this to Renu. I decided not to tell her, that was the final request from Aparna.
I heard the phone ringing again while taking our dinner, Renu went and took the phone, but there was nobody on the line.
It happened twice again, I got a doubt that may be Aparna is calling.
I got an unknown feeling in my mind and so much of worries about that innocent girl.
Renu was also noticed the worries in my face and asked many times, finally I decided to tell her that, to get a relief for my mind.
After hearing all the stories, she was little angry to me because of not telling her when her first call came.
I told her the reason that I didn’t do that.
After a lot of thinking she came up with a strong decision that I couldn’t take.

She told me to go with her tomorrow and see that boy and get all the photos and warn him to not disturb her any more.
She said this is the case of the life of a young girl, “we can’t avoid it just like that ayyan, and more over she is the only daughter of my dearest teacher and you also heard that how much she is suffering for her and she is living only for her.”
“So you must go tomorrow and do that Ayyan please”
Yes, what she says is correct, I should go and now I am the only person responsible to save her.
I decided that and slept with a peaceful mind.
We were eagerly waiting for her call from the morning but she didn’t call.
Then Renu decided to call her house.
First two times the ring was going on but nobody took the phone..
Third time somebody took but that was not Aparna or teacher, it was a male voice.
Renu gave phone to me, I asked. “Is this teacher’s house?”
Yes who is this?
I am her friend, can I get her?
He said, how can I give her now, didn’t you know everything?
What everything? No I didn’t know?
Her daughter committed suicide yesterday night.
What?
Phone dropped down from my hands and I sat on bed with out any voice.
…………
…………
Dear Aparna, forgive me …forgive to this bad world.
I didn’t tell this story to anybody, if I do, may be I can put that boy in jail, but I didn’t want to spoil the respectful life that both of them lived so far, and what else ,Aparna has gone and she is not going to come back. And I believe that a judge and court is there better than all the judges in the world and he will give punishment to him.
I put them behind my memories …
I am not going to see her again any more….its sure….
I forgot her also………